13 week appointment and natural birth

I had a Dr appt on Thursday and I don't really know how to sum that up to exactly how it went.
This time I knew I had to go in and had to ask the doc some questions about the hospital and how 'natural' they would let me go.
Me and my husband met with a doula last Tuesday and it went very well. I know whether I birth in a hospital or a birthing center I will have a doula. Makes sense to me. Think about it, do you do anything in life without some kind of training or instructions or coaching? Why would you go into the biggest moment in your life as a woman without the best support possible? Doulas know exactly what you are going through and are there to support you and keep you going.

We get into the room and wait and wait like usual.
I thought I would have an abdominal ultrasound since I am over 13 weeks but nope. Transvaginal again.. I figured he does that because you can see the baby better and this time he was going to try to tell the gender.
We see the alien I mean baby. For real, I thought it would look so much cuter!! But the baby was just scary looking. Had a huge head! But that is normal. Baby's head is still half of its length I guess at this point in the pregnancy. This ultrasound was the most uneventful one so far. Baby is a lot bigger and that's cool but its kinda hard to tell what we're looking at in there.
We don't want to know the gender until the reveal and the doc knew that so he stayed above the legs so we didn't get a peek! :)
And then it was time for the doc to try to see what the baby was. And I told him that if he was not 100% able to tell then to wait and I'll wait till my next appt to try again. I don't want any chance of the reveal being wrong. That would suck! But him and the nurse looked and looked for a little while and I guess were able to see clearly. They were real emotionless during it. I guess to not give anything away. He printed off the ultrasound pictures, tore one off and took it with him to seal in the envelope!
Came back in the room and handed me the envelope and started to walk out and I had to tell him to hold on I have some questions this time!
Every single appt I have been to, he has not once asked me if I have any questions. He has not once asked me how everything is and if I have any concerns. He has not once sat down and told me what I should be doing, shouldn't be doing, might feel, anything! Everything I have learned throughout my pregnancy so far I have had to learn on my own and do my own research. But then he says not to listen to Dr Google! Well what the hell. You haven't even tried teaching or informing me about a single thing! So anyway.

This appointment I had to ask him questions about natural births in his hospital.
First thing I don't like and am completely uncomfortable with is that they will have to put an IV starter in me as soon as I get there. You can tell me its just a precaution all you want. But a needle is a needle. And if I don't want it in my arm I should not have to have it in my arm.
This sways my opinion a lot toward a birthing center.

Then everything he had to say was complete blabber to me. I didn't understand how he was answering my questions. It was intimidating. And I honestly cant even explain our conversation because I learned NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!! I was just wasting his time.
I have to point out that he is an awesome guy. Personality wise me him and my husband get along great. But in all reality. He is going to be there to catch my baby and that's it. I think that mothers should be able to get to know the nurses that will actually be there at your side in the hospital more through out pregnancy. Because when you go into the hospital to deliver you have nofuckingidea who these people are! And they are controlling your birth! That is another thing I feel completely uncomfortable about.

We are going to go to the open house at the Special Delivery Birthing Center next Tuesday and I cant wait! I feel like this is what I am supposed to do. Everything and anything about a hospital does not seem right to me. So we will see how this goes! We will get to tour the birthing center and meet the midwives and I'm so excited about it.

I bought the book Ina May's Guide to Childbirth and I am looking forward to reading it. Ina May is the leading Midwife in America. She is THE midwife. Like the original one. And she is just amazing! I have watched the documentary on Netflix The Business of Being Born and its incredible! And then there is More Business of Being Born and it has a lot more of Ina May in it. I highly recommend any woman pregnant or not to watch these. It will open your eyes like no other!

Picture and video time from the appointment

Heartbeat 173bpm